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005: You’re not Strong because of Cancer, you were Strong all Along

Updated: Jun 22, 2021

Wisdom from The Boobie Queen




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Episode Summary:

In this episode of the Your Killer Life podcast, Tammey talks with Whitney O’Connor. Whitney is a powerhouse of joy and founder of the Boobie Crown Company which she launched while undergoing oncology treatment with a very successful Kickstarter campaign and the intention to bring joy to others going through treatments. Diagnosed just after getting married and just before her 30th birthday, Whitney shares her wisdom when it comes to finding and creating happiness, while also reminding us that we were born with the strength to see this through. Currently undergoing treatment for her recurrence of cancer, Whitney talks with us about how she and her husband, the Boobie King, continue to find love, laughter and strength in one another.


“You know... you're not strong just because you have to go through breast cancer. You are strong to begin with. And we need to remember that. We need to remember that we were Queens from the beginning. We had the tools from the beginning.” -Whitney O'Connor Click to tweet

Topics in this Episode:

  • Newlywed and Newly Diagnosed

  • Family History and Hidden Genes

  • Adapting to New Realities and an Ever-Changing Body

  • Desperately Seeking Data

  • Finding Joy in the Fight

  • Service is a Love Language

  • The Boobie Crown

  • Please Reach Out if You Are Lost

  • Signing Off

Contact Information and Social Links:

Guest Contact Information and Social Links:

Resources:


Transcript:

Tammey: Hello and welcome to the Your Killer Life podcast. I am your host, Tammey Grable-Woodford, and I am so excited today because I have a very special guest with me, Whitney O'Connor, and Whitney, you are also known as the Boobie Queen, and I cannot wait to share your story with our listeners. So, can you kick us off and tell us a little bit about you?


Whitney: Absolutely. Thank you for having me, Tammey. I'm super pumped to be here and chat with you about all things boobs. So yeah, I am a 33 year old, breast… soon to be two time breast cancer survivor. Um, I'm currently going through my second round of treatment for breast cancer after a reoccurrence. I am also a licensed therapist as well, and do that, uh, as as my job and worked for a crisis hospital and have a little side business, which I will talk about with you guys.

But yeah, in a nutshell, that's a little bit about me.


Tammey: So, as a licensed therapist, I have to ask, do you work with other cancer patients and survivors, or is it outside of that and in something different?


Whitney: It's outside of that and in something different. However, I will say that we get people that come in who are in crisis because they just got bad news from the doctor and they're having a hard time with it. So, and they end up having a mental health crisis because of the news that they heard. So, we do encounter lots of people all ages in the crisis center that are going through some sort of something. So.


Tammey: So, I of course did my homework before we got on the podcast here, and if it's okay, I want to talk a little bit about when you were diagnosed because you are, you know, you're about to go through it… you're a two time survivor.


You're, you're only 33 and I was diagnosed at 43 and I'm older than that now, (both laughing) but you know, I would say both of us were diagnosed pretty young. You definitely very young. And so can you talk to us a little bit about how you discovered, what took you to the doctor and just kind of that, that whole process when you found out that, and you know what was going on in your life when you were diagnosed.


Newlywed and Newly Diagnosed

The Boobie Queen wedding

Whitney: Absolutely. So, a lot was going on in my life actually. I had just gotten married before I found out about breast cancer. So, I got married on New Year’s Eve in 2016 I went in January for my annual exam, and when I went in for my annual exam, my gynecologists uh, was feeling some lumps in my breasts and wanted me to have a mammogram.


And so, I went in to get my mammogram, and then after my mammogram, they put me in this other room. And those of you out there who have been through this, you know about the other room…


Tammey: Oh the other room…


Whitney: …yeah… went into the other room and another doctor came in and said, yeah, we're going to have to do a biopsy.


I didn't know exactly what that meant. I didn't know what was next. I didn't know that process. And I turned 30 the week after that, uh, after I got that news. Turn 30 and the following week I went in for my biopsy.


Now I did a thing that's probably not recommended by most people. Uh, I didn't tell anybody about any of this. I didn't even tell my new husband.


Tammey: Wow.


Whitney: I told my husband about all of this the night before, I went in to get a biopsy and he was like, Whitney, are you kidding me? Like, what are you thinking? Like what? Why didn't you talk to me about this? And all of that. And so I'm just the kind of person I want to know what I'm dealing with before I start breaking everybody's heart.


So, I told him the night before, he was very supportive, very sweet. And, we went in, did my biopsy and got the news the next week or so that it was breast cancer. And not only was it breast cancer, it was Stage 3 breast cancer, and it was recommended that I start moving with treatment immediately. So we had a lot of big decisions to make as a newlywed couple in a short period of time.

So that was a little stressful.


Tammey: Yes!


Whitney: If you can imagine. So, um, yeah, that was the unexpected, newly would gift that we got.


Tammey: So, you were diagnosed uh, stage 3b, and it's interesting you say you don't know what the biopsy and the process, it's very interesting to me, especially now as I'm in more survivor groups.

I'll admit, for me, I was very self-focused my first few years, right? I was researching everything relative to me. And so my diagnosis was infiltrating lobular carcinoma, and I didn't know. And for me, I found out the same day I went for the mammo, and then I got tucked into that little room. Then I went and had an ultrasound and her radiologist said, you've got cancer, you've got a lot of it, and we need to do a biopsy.


And then I got the phone call about mastectomies before I even had my biopsies. So… it's interesting to me, like the… the timing is so different for each of us. And so what type of breast cancer were you diagnosed with? Because I really want to highlight that there are so many, so many people think breast cancer is breast cancer and treatment is treatment.


And I and I did until I was diagnosed with it. So can you talk a little bit about your, your specific um… type of cancer.


Whitney: Yeah, absolutely. So I was diagnosed with HER2 positive. I immediately went into surgery mode when I found out that I had cancer. So… we had a lot of gift cards from our wedding and we went to the store and went and bought a bunch of surgery materials like the wedge and like the pregnancy pillow, you know, all of those different pillows and different things that they recommend you to have. That's what we spent our gift cards on, and we did that immediately. I did research and I was just feeling more and more at ease about it because I could get these things off of me. Right? I could go ahead and get the boobs away from me and I was fine with that.


Well then after, probably after a couple of weeks I found out…


You know what, I keep saying a week, couple of weeks, all of these days blurred together. You know what I mean? Like I'm, I'm, while I'm thinking about it, I'm like, was it two weeks. It was probably two days, but it felt like two weeks…


But anyway, um, my surgeon was like, yeah, we're going to have to do chemotherapy first and then surgery, and that was just like, Oh, really? I have to have these things on me. Like I just want to have the surgery. I want the boobies off. I'm okay with that. Let's just get it going. And I was not happy about having to have to do chemo first.


My father had to go through chemotherapy and my mother and brother and I were great caretakers for him, and that was only two years prior to this diagnosis.


Tammey: Wow.


Family History and Hidden Genes

Whitney: Yeah. So I had my dad who had a brain tumor, chemo, cancer, and passed away. Then two years later, I had to tell my family all over again, “Hey, we gotta do this cancer thing again.”


So I was familiar with what chemo looked like, and I was not looking forward to it. So that was the treatment recommendation, followed by radiation, which I did not do. So those are the things that that were part of my treatment plan.


Tammey: It's interesting, you and I were talking a little bit in the, what I like to call the technical green room, about different treatment options and how everyone takes a different path than even how recommendations are different. And I would say even now that I'm five years from my original diagnosis, it's interesting to see how some things are changing as far as medical recommendations, depending on the type of cancer that you have.


So… but there was a reason that you declined radiation. And was it as much a choice as it was a medical recommendation, or was it both? And do you want to talk a little bit about that?


Whitney: Yes, yes, absolutely. So it was recommended that I not have radiation. And the reason why is because I found out during the beginning of treatment, uh, that I have what's called Li-Fraumeni syndrome, and it is a genetic disorder.


It's extremely rare. Only 400 families are documented to even have this disorder. And basically what it means is my T-cells and my body are not defending my body from cancer. We all have T cells that are constantly being the gatekeepers, so to speak. Well, my gatekeepers were not working, so that's why I got cancer so young, um, at 30.


Having radiation on top of that basically would cause more damage than good for, for me. It would, it would damage more cells, which would create more cancer and leave for meaning.


When you have the TP53 gene, it's known as the cancer gene, which is another thing that I, it took me a long time to fully understand what all of that meant. To really wrap my brain around that.


So the cancer gene, basically, meaning that the odds of me getting cancer over and over again are quite high than the normal person. So people would Li-Fraumeni, have to constantly get scanned. Um, we have to constantly go over labs and blood work and all those fun things with our doctor on a regular basis. Just to make sure that we're on top of it.


So that is why I did not do radiation the first time around when I was, when I was going through this in 2017.


Tammey: So when you went through this in 2017 did you find this out as part of genetic testing, which when I was diagnosed that they didn't even do genetic testing, believe it or not, it was like not even mentioned to me…


Whitney: Oh wow.


Tammey: I know. So I all the time I'm asked if I've had genetic testing and no, they didn't do that. And with was stage 3b. I didn't even do a pet scan. Insurance denied it. So, yeah,


Whitney: What?


Tammey: Seriously, and so, and that's why I'm always so amazed at the difference in the whole process from doctor recommendations to insurance companies to what it is that we do.

But did you find this out, back to you, did you find this out as part of your dad's treatment? Was this something that he had or did you find this out as part of genetic testing from your diagnosis?


Whitney: I found this out through genetic testing, through my diagnosis. Um, the first week it was, so I found out in February, started treatment in March, and they did genetic testing with me in March.

So it was at the beginning of, of my treatment process. We think that my father had it as well. We're not sure, but after lots of digging and researching with family, when we looked at our family tree, we did the ancestry.com thing and we looked at my family history as much as we could to try to figure out where it came from, and we do believe it came from my dad's side.


I just had an uncle that passed away from pancreatic cancer in November in 2019. Now again, not sure if he had it. Not sure. Um, but, uh, yeah, it is something I found out and it's just crazy to me that, that's just not a normal thing for everybody for genetic testing.


And I tell people all the time, you know, if your insurance says it paid for it, save up to take the test. I mean, it's like $400 out of pocket, I think here. So in Georgia. So, you know, make the steps to do it because it is a wealth of information for you and you can make some good, healthy decisions if you just know what you're dealing with.


Tammey: All that information is, and I know for me, when I was first diagnosed, I would cling to… because there's opinion and then there's data. And I lived for pathology reports. I lived for imaging reports. I lived for anything that I could count as quantifiable versus a medical opinion or recommendation. And that being just sort of how my brain tends to work.


And. At some point, maybe I should go do the genetic testing. I don't know. (both laughing) One of these days…


Whitney: Yes! You need to.


Tammey: So tell me a little bit about what was the most difficult part for you as far as being diagnosed and being so young and walking through this. I'm one of those, I don't really like the journey word, but you know, walking down this path of a reclamation of, you know, from diagnosis to getting me some form of reclamation for yourself.


Adapting to New Realities and an Ever-Changing Body

Whitney: Hot flashes. (both laughing)


Okay. Let me explain.


Okay, so you guys, this whole breast cancer thing, you will experience hot flashes. And I thought that this was a myth. I thought my mother was making these things up when she would complain about the temperature all the time and like stripping clothes off. I'm like, what are you doing? And. They are real you guys, and you know, it is, it's a real thing. (both laughing)


But in all seriousness, the main thing I learned about hot flashes is that the, the treatment doesn't end with breast cancer. Once you ring the bell.


We all ring a bell once we finished chemotherapy and whatever the treatment journey or regimen is… looks like for you. We ring a bell and it's very exciting.


But what they didn't tell me was that, my body was going to constantly be trying to adapt to a new way. My hormones are going to be all over the place. I'm going to be different. Whether I like it or not. I'm going to look differently. I'm going to feel differently. So… to be honest, Tammey, for me, the treatment part wasn't as difficult as the aftermath part.


The survivor part.


And you know, having anxiety, having depression and having, having all these mental health issues. And I'm a therapist and I'm pretty, I mean, if you talk to anyone that knows me. They will tell you that I'm a pretty optimistic person and it was difficult. And it is difficult. And so we celebrate and we lift people up once they accomplish their goal of treatment. But what… what people forget is that the journey is not over and it's a constant, constant adaptation. I don't want to say battle because that makes it sound like it's all negative and it's not. But it is a constant, constant thing that we have to figure out as. Breast cancer survivors.


And so I remember I was, uh, getting together with my girlfriends and we had a girls' day and had arranged for, um someone to come and do massages for us and pamper us. And we were trying to just celebrate and all those things. And I went in for my massage and halfway through it we were, she was doing, it was a Thai massage, and she says she was doing some stretches with my hips. And we store energy in our hips, especially as women.


And so when she was doing that, all of a sudden I just had a full blown, like meltdown, but in a good way. I mean, I just cried and cried and cried. And I looked at her, the massage therapist, and I just looked at her, and, I don't know, it wasn’t a fluid thought, but it just came to me. I was like, “Oh my God, I did it. Like I did it!” And it was just this revelation of, wow, I just did something really big and really hard, and it's over now. Whoa.


And so I just didn't realize the - the big accomplishment that I even had until much later, if that makes sense.


Tammey: It does. You know, and each of us can only speak from our own perspective and our own truths, and I have said that for me, I don't feel like I really processed it until I was done thinking and planning because in the midst of the diagnosis and the surgeries and the recoveries, I was so laser focused on what do I need, especially in the beginning, what do I need to know today? What do I need to decide today? And then it was, what do I need to know this week and what do I need to decide this week? And then eventually it was in the next few months.


And then I hit a point and I was like, Whoa, six months, something in six months ahead. And you know, eventually I got to the point of. I'm actually here and I probably will still be here for awhile, because I hadn't accepted that yet.


As I got to the end of that process, I was like, wow, now I can start feeling the things that I didn't, I didn't feel, and I didn't process. And I'll tell you, I, you know, I photographed the whole journey. God only knows why... It's not like I posted the photos all over, but I have photos and some of those photos, Whitney, I look back and I, and I cr.. now, they'll make me cry because I don't know how on earth I survived that. How I endured that.


And I have sort of changed my language a little bit. I'm not shy about saying it is a breast amputation, like don't church it up. It is an amputation. And it is brutal and it is violent in what it looks like. And in that process, and until you know you're, you're sort of… until it's you going through it, right? You just sort of accept the… oh yeah, well, if you get breast cancer, it's okay. There's typically, you know, the outcomes are really good and you “just have a mastectomy and chemotherapy, and that's just it. Badabing, badaboom, and you're better!” and no, it's not. That’s not the case.


Desperately Seeking Data

Whitney: Yeah. Well you and I have a lot of similarities then cause that was the same way I was… we were in full blown. Okay, “What's the plan? What does the research say? You know, what do the professionals say? Why does this professional differ from this one? What's the best preventative measure for this?” And that kind of thing. And so it wasn't until afterwards where I just was like, “Whoa, I just did this really big thing.”


I think a lot of me keeping it together had to do with, uh, my family as well. Like we had just gone through this whole cancer thing with my dad, literally. And caretaking is not easy. It's, it is, it is taxing is tiresome. And not to mention you're watching someone that you love and care about kind of wither away, and you're trying to be joyful and make the best of it and, and all these things. And it's just a lot.


And so being a caretaker and a patient, as the patient, I stuffed probably more than I should have. Um, I didn't want my new husband, first of all, to regret marrying me, (both laughing) and I didn't want my mother to go through this whole taxing process again with her daughter. And so there was a lot of that going on. And so I, I really, you know. Had to suck it up, buttercup kind of attitude and just did it and it was hard and difficult.


Looking back, doing it again. It's a different process, which we've been talking about in a minute, but yeah, so, so going through all of that and just trying to keep a straight face was, was interesting.


Tammey: Yeah. I think you are compelled to be strong for everybody else, and it's a weird, and maybe even for yourself, I say that, you know for me in particular anyway, you know, the five stages of grief, it was like a ping pong ball at a high velocity because you think you have just gotten through one aspect of it and you get new news, new information, new whatever treatment option, whatever it is, you now have a new thing to deny or grieve or get angry about as you are just constantly bombarded.


So talk to us about the second diagnosis and sort of how that came about, if, if you knew or if that was part of your scans and how you process that, how you, I love how you guys tackle this together.

So for our listeners, I just want you to know that after this bit we are going to talk about joy because Whitney is one of the most joyful giving people. She's so amazing. And so there's so much good in this. But do tell us about that second time around because were you two years ago? Or like a year and a half out and diagnosed again or…


Whitney: Yeah, so that was a lovely Christmas present…


Tammey: Man…


Whitney: I, as a way, well, I have to do scans, like I mentioned before, because of the Li-Fraumeni disorder, and so I was going in for my annual scan, which was in December. And got the news aft.. probably about three or four days after my scan that they had found two spots, one behind my left breast, which is where the cancer was the first time and one spot in my collarbone on the right side. And so, uh, that was just very devastating.


But also super annoying, just to be honest. Like you know, it was just so annoying like I just wanted to be like, listen, could you have not given me like five years? I mean, give me five years before reoccurance, why just two? I just, you know, got the Boobie Queen Company off the ground, you know, and, and, and working through that. And so, anyway, it was just super annoying and devastating.


So, we immediately, again, you know, went into full blown treatment mode, doing all the research, figuring out all the things. I got a, an opinion by my doctor and we actually wanted a second opinion. My doctor encouraged us to get a second opinion. We flew from Georgia to Sloan Kettering in New York and met with their specialists there.


We met with an oncologist, a surgeon, and a radiologist, and it was recommended that I go through chemotherapy again. It was recommended that I have surgery to remove the tissue, uh, where the tumor was once the chemotherapy was, was completed. And then it was recommended for me to do proton therapy, which is a type of radiation, but it's not as dangerous to my body as regular radiation.


So that was recommended for me. And, and plea it also, this was all stage one. So for a normal person, probably surgery. Maybe some radiation would suffice, but for me, since I'm so special, I get to do the whole daggone thing again. So, um, you guys can't see me at home, but I am freshly bald and it is shining in the sun, um, nice and glistening. So, yeah, here we are.


Tammey: You know what though? I always thank Sinead O'Connor for making that, uh, an actual look. (both laughing)


So talk to me about finding joy, because this is, this is so heavy and it can be so dark and it's so hard sometimes to lift yourself up out of that and not get stuck and let your brain race ahead with all of the, what abouts. Right? And even after, like, I'll tell you, I joke all the time, “Oh, it's gotta be a cancer cavity.” and it's not really a joke. I'm like, “Oh no, that's gotta be a cancer mole.” Right? I just always have that fear… that I got a weird itch on my arm… it's so, you know...


Whitney: Yeees….


Finding joy in the fight

Tammey: It's always there. But talk to us about how you find joy, how your husband, because this is, this is a success story that so many women I think need to hear. That… that you had a person who stepped in and was caregiver and, and you guys are still in it and you're in it together and you're strong. I've seen, I can't wait for the listeners… we'll have some links to the, uh, is it “Boobie Queen and Quarantine” Chronicles?


Whitney: Yes… “Queen in Quarantine Chronicles”


Tammey: That’s it! So we'll have some links to that because you guys are so together and so joyous and the, and of course, we all know there's dark times behind that, we can't be joyful all the time. But how do you find that joy? What advice do you have for folks and helping them find that joy and talk to us about keys to relationship.


Whitney: Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Um, the Boobie King aka my husband, he is, um, pretty much my biggest advocate that I have. He is a fighter as well. And when I say fighter, he actually did you Jitsu and, uh, kickboxing and, and trained professionally for a period of time. And so his natural instinct is to fight.


Well, when you watch your wife go through something like this, there's, he can't do it for me… He can't, you know, do the chemo. He can't do the surgery. He can't take my pain away. He can't do any of that.


So in all honesty, he had a hard time at first because he couldn't “fight” for me. And so he had to find different ways to fight. And his different ways we're doing all the research, doing all those things that I didn't want to do, and figuring out how he could serve me. Instead of being lost in this anxiety cloud and being upset, and you know, woe is me. He was in full blown solution mode. And you know, what can I do? What can I do? And as for finding joy, that is something that he, he helped me do, and I helped him do, to be quite honest.

Um, and in order to do that, we had to figure out what our needs were. So I'm an extrovert. He is an introvert, right? So we have different needs. I love people. I love talking. I love community. I love all that stuff. Uh, my husband is the opposite. He likes intimate community. He likes to be at home. He likes quality time in small groups. He likes quiet, which is so weird that he married me because I'm such a loud person.


(both laughing)


But.. um, in order to find joy, we had to figure out what our needs were, you know, for, for me to blare some music and, you know, invite 50 people over… that's not joyful for him. So, you know, we had to really understand what that meant for us.


And so him being compassionate and open to, okay, these are Whitney's needs. She likes to go for walks. Well, she's not going to be able to go for a walks when she's going through chemo. So how can I get her outside? How can I help her walk down the street without her being in pain?


Whitney likes to cook. Well, she's, she may not have not have the energy to cook. Okay, so what are her favorite recipes? How can I learn how to make it? Maybe she can help me make her favorite thing one night and show me how to make it.


Okay. Well, Whitney is the one who washed his clothes, and I'm the one who does the dishes. Well, I don't know how to wash clothes. I'd rather buy all new clothes before I wash clothes. So how am I going to wash clothes before, you know, uh, while she's going through this.


So this, this little sweetheart, he followed me around before my mastectomy for like a whole day and just watch some of the things that I did. As far as like how to load the, you know, um, the laundry. Cause that was an agreement that we had, that I would do the laundry, he would do the dishes. And so he knew that he had to kind of pick up that slack. So he just learned how to do it.


Service is a love language

That was his way of fighting. His way of fighting was service. And so I would encourage any caregivers out there who are just in the like, just loss as to what to do.


Try to be of service. How can I serve her today? Um, how, how can I figure out a way to bring her joy today? Because this whole cancer thing, you know, is hard to find... this is what I tell people all the time. It's so hard to find silver linings when you're going through this chaotic, chaotic journey, but sometimes you have to create your own.


So, you know, we're very silly people. And you know, we like to play games and we like to, uh, you know, build a fort in the living room for absolutely no reason. So that brings us joy. Who cares? Who cares?


So we, you just have to create your own silver linings. And that's what we do. That's what we try to do to find joy because some of this stuff is really hard to take on and you can't do it unless you create your own silver lining.


Tammey: I love that. And it sounds like service is a very important, love language for you, and that you also found joy in the Boobie Queen and talk to us about what, for those that have listened from the beginning and they're like, what on earth is this Boobie Queen thing that they keep talking about?


It seems like this was a way for you to pay it forward, to bring joy to others and to… to share your light and energy. And it sounds like you guys are really good partners in this, solid partners in this Boobie King and Queen or queen and King process. So let's talk about Boobie Royalty!


Whitney: Oh, yeah, girl… so we, um, we are all things boobs in this house.

Uh, there are bras everywhere. So, um, the Boobie Queen company, what we do is we provide Boobie Crowns that I make out of bras and we provide them to women who don't have the same support system as I had. When I was going through chemotherapy and going through this process. Me and my husband would see women that were alone.


They would do treatment alone. They would hear this news alone. They would have to talk to the doctor alone. They would have to go home alone and all these things. And I just realized that I wasn't the only Boobie Queen out there and there was tons of Boobie Queens.


So how could I make them feel special?


So I thought of this idea where I could do a one for one business.


So for, uh, someone who wants to uplift the person in their life that is going through breast cancer, they could buy a Boobie Crown and when you do buy a Boobie Crown, I donate one on your behalf. So when you buy one, you're buying two, one for your loved one, and one for person that I'm connected with, a few places around in my community that I make donations to.


And definitely with this coronavirus stuff happening I've been finding more and more folks at home. Um, obviously when they're going through treatment, even feeling more isolated, trying to target those women to give them Boobie Crowns and all it is you guys, it is a bra that you wear on your head. Like a crown. That's all it is. (both laughing)


Tammey: Okay. But that doesn't quite do it justice because it is a bedazzled bra that is on your head.


The Boobie crown

So for those of you that are thinking, cause you can't see us, who are thinking weird science, the movie from the eighties… it's not like that. It is shaped like a Tiara, like a crown. And of course we'll have links in the show notes, you guys, and also links to the videos and the, and the website. But they're beautiful.


So do you bedazzle them or does Chace bedazzle those?


Whitney: We both do, and he takes a lot of pride in his crowns that he makes for every crown that I make it takes... well, it takes him twice as long to make his. Because he's so particular about it. It's so cute and so hilarious. Um, but yes, he does help me make them.

And we did do a Kickstarter that we, uh, we started in February. Um, we met our goal. We actually exceeded our goal and that money was going to, or is going to pay for production, um, is going to pay for materials to make booby crowns for folks. People did preorders through the Kickstarter. Um, the goal is to get them manufactured so that I can get them into as many women's hands as I can.


Please reach out if you’re lost

Caregivers are the main folks that reach out to me because they're clueless on what to do. I can't tell. I don't know about you, Tammey, but I get texts, phone calls, emails on a weekly basis. From friends, family members, random people saying, “Hey, I just found out that my friend has breast cancer and I have no idea what to do for her. What, what was helpful for you?”


And, uh, my fridge was filled with casseroles. Oh my gosh. In the South, that's what we do, y'all, we give each other casseroles. When we don't know what to do… when someone dies, when someone's sick… that's what we do. We give the casseroles and we give fuzzy socks. We give blankets. We give a… adult coloring books, all of those things.


And um, I got tons of that stuff and I appreciated every single bit of it. I wouldn't be surprised if there was a casserole still frozen in my freezer right now, to be honest. But, um, the thing, the thing about the Boobie Crown that I just really want people to get is that, yeah, you're wearing a bra on your head and it's silly, but it's also supposed to remind you of what you already are.


You know you're not strong just because you have to go through breast cancer. You are strong to begin with. And we need to remember that. We need to remember that we were Queens from the beginning. We had the tools from the beginning. Because we're going to go through hard things, whether that be cancer, whether that be the Corona virus, whether that be a loss and a death, losing our jobs, a financial struggles, whatever it is. We're going to go through hard stuff and we are strong enough to do it.


So that is what the Boobie Crown is supposed to before, is to ignite the Queen that's already inside you. And that's what I try to proclaim and empower women to do when they put these bras on their heads. (both laughing)


Tammey: I love it. And they are gorgeous. Like seriously, when you describe what it is, it's hard to imagine that it's a gorgeous, gorgeous thing. But they are. They're absolutely beautiful.


Whitney: Thank you.


Signing off

Tammey: You're so welcome. They are, so you have your crown shop, you are also a speaker, and you of course are an advocate. And with everything that you do in supporting other women who are going through that same journey.


And so before we wrap up, would you like to tell our listeners where they can find you, learn more about your journey and find their own crown or I'm sure that if there's somebody listening that, um, isn't going through it right now, would like to do a buy one and, you know, just donate both of them. They could probably do that too I imagine?


Whitney: Absolutely. So you can go to www.boobiecrowns.com um, there is a place on there that you can make a donation if you would like to contribute. All of that money goes towards production of, uh, donated Boobie Crowns, and you can do that on the website.

There's also a spot on my website that you can look into, speaking, uh, I do love to speak. I love to share my story. I love to talk, and I just think it's important for people to be empowered through, uh, my cancer journey, but also to see what they can accomplish on their own and realize that we're all going to go through hard stuff. And so you can check that out.


You can follow me on Instagram, @BoobieQueenChronicles, um, and see what I'm up to, what shenanigans I'm up to.


My husband and I decided to start a YouTube channel because it is 37 days that I've been home and what else do we have to do? So we decided to start a YouTube channel, and you will find me pranking my husband, uh, dancing, uh, you know, clowning around. We will be in our robes because we, uh, love robes. And don't judge us. We will always be wearing our robes during, during our YouTube shows. So you can check that out. It's called “Queen in Quarantine” on YouTube. Uh, you could, uh, also join our, um, support group. I have a support group through my Facebook page on the Boobie Queen Company.


If you just search The Boobie Queens on Facebook, you'll see my bald head in a pink shirt and you can join our support group. And I get on there and there's, there's about 52 women in there right now and we just bounce ideas off of each other and reach out to one another and make each other laugh. We have game night, all those kinds of fun things.


So that's, that's where you can figure out what I'm up to.


Tammey: I love it! And you guys, those of you who are listening, all of those links will be in the show notes and so we will make sure that folks can find you Whitney and also find the site. And where to donate and where to buy a crown or donate a crown, because that is awesome. They are beautiful.


Whitney: Thank you so much.

Tammey: Oh my gosh. Yes. Thank you so much for sharing your inspirational story, and for those of you listening today, please make sure to click like… give us a comment. If you have a question, go ahead and drop the question… whether you're watching on the YouTube channel or wherever it is that you're listening, and I'll let Whitney know if it's a question for Whitney and just.

Hey until next time, thank you so much and keep building your killer life.


Remember the conversations you hear on the show are based on unique experiences and varying diagnosis. And we all had our own medical teams. We are not giving medical advice. So if you hear something inspiring, please talk with your providers.
 

#breastcancer #medicaladvocacy #yourkillerlife #yourkillerlifepodcast #ILC #bilateralmastectomies #cancersurvivor #cancertrauma #cancerptsd #cancercaregiver #lymphoma #theboobiequeen #boobiecrowns #lifrauminisyndrome #lobular


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